HBB's firey hot dinner

I've learned I'm no fireman.

That's okay. Neither is my boss.

Tonight I was having dinner with my boss at a fairly swanky restaurant. It had white linens and low lights and candles. Very classy. They have paper table covers so the wait staff can write their names to make you feel at home.

As we were recovering from a large dinner, my boss leaned back in his chair, wishing he was already in his recliner. Just then, a frantic woman at the table next to him was trying to get his attention. "Sir, sir, SIR!" she was pointing behind him. Just then I noticed flames leaping up behind my boss. He whipped around thinking he was on fire. Actually, the empty table behind us was in flames. The candle had caught the paper cover on fire. The fire was growing quickly.

My boss was closest to the fire, so he started trying to smother it with his napkin. This killed much of the fire, but it started to spread in a new direction across the table. The whole time plastic from under the tablecloth was starting to drip to the floor as it melted. I looked at my glass of water. My first reaction, at a time when split seconds counted, was, "pouring water on it would make such a mess!" GAH! But, my sensible side took over. I grabbed my glass of water and flung it across the table top. My boss did the same with is. A waiter followed immediately with an entire pitcher. We returned to our table with our charred linen napkins.

The smell of melted plastic was terrible. We stayed and talked about how terrible our fire-fighting skills were. I, for one, obviously have no fireman instincts to speak of. We were also talking about how amazing it was that we were so oblivious of a small campfire right next to us in a busy restaurant. It was a little startling. I was also amazed at the speed of it all.

Even as we sat paying the bill, (No, no "fire sale" discount), we were chuckling about the number of tables around us who were asking the waiters what the smell was. They were oblivious of our heroic (albeit unskilled) firefighting.

Have you ever had one of those friends with whom you know some unexpected adventure will always follow? We need to start charging restaurants NOT to frequent them.


Bluegrass Mama said...

I can't believe they didn't comp at least part of your check! I once set the oil in my wok on fire and wasted a few second trying to figure out if you use baking soda on a grease fire before I remembered that I had an actual fire extinguisher.

Midas said...

Oh gosh...I'll be like Catherine Zeta Jones, I'm so out of there forgetting everything else!

Granny said...

They should have comped your meal.

Please thank Keri for her comment on my blog. I don't think I have her email address or I'd do it myself.

Keri, the birds can't get into ours but the homeless pick through looking for bottles and cans to recycle. Usually it's okay. They don't leave a mess.

vicki said...

The tags are making me laugh. Glad you passed on the toast.